Why You Shouldn't Play the Hero (Cathryn Harper)

Everyone wants to be the hero, whether at work with your colleagues or at home with your family and friends. We want to be supportive, and customer focussed, and react immediately to every need. But sometimes, being too quick to help can have some unintended consequences. Here are some reasons why not coming to the rescue may actually be the right thing to do.

You Can Get Pulled into Something Much Bigger: Everybody has done it: spoken up at a meeting, or answered an email, because you have some inside knowledge that no one knows about, that you think can help solve a problem. You mean to provide some sage advise and move on. The people involved now see you as a critical resource that may need to be intimately involved in the project, or event going forward. Unless your motivation is to take on bigger responsibilities at that fund raiser, parent meeting, or client project, thinking twice before speaking is probably a good thing.

Things Sometimes Work Themselves Out: For years my husband has worked in technology. Many times people will raise flags about project deliverables or user problems that seem to require immediate attention. I've watched as entire teams of people have galvanized themselves into action,making plans, calling in favors, only to find out that the problem has resolved itself in the intervening hours. On occasion, letting a few hours or even a day go by before responding to an issue can actually result in better use of your and everyone else's time.

Letting Others Step Up: While we may like the feeling of being indispensable, quite often there are other capable individuals involved who can resolve the problem at hand. Many times they might be the ones asking for help in the first place, because they've become complacent or dependent upon you. If you know someone has the skill set to solve the issue, let them take a shot at it first. Letting them do so will help them build confidence and give you some additional back-up when things happen in the future. And you can always step in to help, any time, if you see that they're struggling.

I'm not suggesting that you don't offer your help in situations where you think doing so may have a significant positive impact. Just take the time before reacting, to assess the situation and see if your help is truly needed, or if it's time to let someone else wear the cape.

Cathryn is a working mother of three. A self-professed health and fitness nut, Cathryn loves to research and write about health and wellness related topics. For more details please visit at http://www.cathrynharperpress.com/

Everyone wants to be the hero, whether at work with your colleagues or at home with your family and friends. We want to be supportive, and customer focussed, and react immediately to every need. But sometimes, being too quick to help can have some unintended consequences. Here are some reasons why not coming to the rescue may actually be the right thing to do.

You Can Get Pulled into Something Much Bigger: Everybody has done it: spoken up at a meeting, or answered an email, because you have some inside knowledge that no one knows about, that you think can help solve a problem. You mean to provide some sage advise and move on. The people involved now see you as a critical resource that may need to be intimately involved in the project, or event going forward. Unless your motivation is to take on bigger responsibilities at that fund raiser, parent meeting, or client project, thinking twice before speaking is probably a good thing.

Things Sometimes Work Themselves Out: For years my husband has worked in technology. Many times people will raise flags about project deliverables or user problems that seem to require immediate attention. I've watched as entire teams of people have galvanized themselves into action,making plans, calling in favors, only to find out that the problem has resolved itself in the intervening hours. On occasion, letting a few hours or even a day go by before responding to an issue can actually result in better use of your and everyone else's time.

Letting Others Step Up: While we may like the feeling of being indispensable, quite often there are other capable individuals involved who can resolve the problem at hand. Many times they might be the ones asking for help in the first place, because they've become complacent or dependent upon you. If you know someone has the skill set to solve the issue, let them take a shot at it first. Letting them do so will help them build confidence and give you some additional back-up when things happen in the future. And you can always step in to help, any time, if you see that they're struggling.

I'm not suggesting that you don't offer your help in situations where you think doing so may have a significant positive impact. Just take the time before reacting, to assess the situation and see if your help is truly needed, or if it's time to let someone else wear the cape.

Cathryn is a working mother of three. A self-professed health and fitness nut, Cathryn loves to research and write about health and wellness related topics. For more details please visit at http://www.cathrynharperpress.com/